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 Ramblings of a Cynical Heart

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PostSubject: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 07 Aug 2011, 6:38 am

Shes happy. Over and over again, it lingers in my mind. Shes happy and its not with me. Period. Another day of endless pretensions and fake smiles would pass. Who am I cheating? I can tell her in a thousand ways that Im happy for her. I am. Im gonna be happy for her even if it means breaking my own heart.

Shell sing so many love songs, love songs that Im so fond of. Shell sing it, sadly though its not for me. Shell hug me and kiss my cheeks, but its someone else shell hold in her arms forever and kiss on the lips. Shell laugh and her eyes will sparkle with delight. All because shes with the one person that she love.

Ive been with her, all this time. Ive spent forever by her side and seen the worst of the world pass us by. I felt her pain like no one else could. I shared her dreams because I know they will come true. Shes the reason why Im happy, the reason why Im sad. The very reason for my being. The only reason of my life.

I love her. I have been for the longest time now. Ive seen the world fade before my very eyes. Ive seen her gone away with it when she told me we can never be one. Ive been living the perfect cynical life. Pathetic and hopeless. Living for a moment and dying the next second. How can I keep on, when Im still in love with her?

I kept waiting. Waiting for her to see my worth. Waiting for her to know. A lifetimes not that long after all. Because I know that no matter how hurtful it is, Im willing to go through the same painful path on my next lifetime if it means being with her again.
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Tue 09 Aug 2011, 7:51 am

nakakarelate ako sa sinulat mo.. I hope waiting is worth doing for...=(
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Wed 10 Aug 2011, 6:23 pm

@shan06 ... I don't know if i should be happy knowing someone like you can actually relate to what I have written ... coz it definitely means another heartbreak in our world... thank you though .. :)

@aletheia ... guess i'm not yet ready to face the real world of writing :D but sure, maybe someday, somehow... i'm allotting the next 26 years of my life to fulfill my dream of publishing my own book.. baka kasama ka pala dun:D thank you for the wonderful words..
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Thu 11 Aug 2011, 10:37 am

eto bang sinulat mo na to experience mo? (hehehe..mukhang engot ba ako) nywez, ganung-ganun din ako nung dalaginding pa lamang at di alam na nagmamahal na pala ng lubusan sa kanyang bespren.

way to go kid!
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Mon 15 Aug 2011, 4:18 pm

@aletheia... hehe i don't trust the government.. mahirap yatang humingi ng funds sa gobyerno para lang makapagpublish ng "L" book... siguro someday soon.. hindi naman ako nagmamadali... pero thank you sa suggestion :)
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 21 Aug 2011, 5:32 am

hahaha... hindi mo pa maxadong gusto si pareng plato ng lagay na yan ah??? :D

taga gawa ka lang ng meryenda???? lugi ata ako dun ah.. hindi pa naman ako nakain pag tumitipa... nagyoyosi ako hahahahahaha
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 21 Aug 2011, 5:59 am

:D nagyoyosi lang ako pag nasa labas... bawal dito sa bahay... saka pag gabi pag tulog na si mama at may hinahabol akong tumatakbong deadline.. :D kelangan yun... ok lang magyosi ng magyosi ngaun, wala pa namang hahalik sa akin eh wahahahaha

pag nadelikado baga ko.. wala ng gamot gamot.. idodonate ko na lang yung pera sa ampunan kesa sayangin sa pagpapagamot ng mga "patapon daw" na kagaya ko hahahaha...
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 21 Aug 2011, 8:17 am

marlboro black.. alam mo na ibibigay sa akin... para matapang tapang at mapabilis pagakachugi ng baga ko, red pede na rin... :D

nemen hindi kasentihan yan... iyan ay katotohanan... mas gusto kong isipin na patapon ako... at least may basurahan na sasalo sa akin pagdating ng panahon hahahaha
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Tue 30 Aug 2011, 3:46 am

This brat thinks what you wrote here is good.. What's better than words from the heart right? The brat likes what you wrote here. The brat can relate..
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Tue 30 Aug 2011, 6:56 am

EnolaegneeksaJ wrote:
This brat thinks what you wrote here is good.. What's better than words from the heart right? The brat likes what you wrote here. The brat can relate..

oh geeeez... thanks for liking what I wrote... brat :)
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Tue 30 Aug 2011, 8:11 am

Why don't you try applying for the Palanca awards next time around? Mga ganitong time yata sila tumatanggap ng entries.

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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Tue 30 Aug 2011, 1:20 pm

Blue wrote:
Why don't you try applying for the Palanca awards next time around? Mga ganitong time yata sila tumatanggap ng entries.


Dream ko yan eh.. Maging recipient ng Palanca Award... Kaso naiintimidate pa ako... hahaha... Uso din kasi social discrimination sa kanila... Siguro in time.. :)
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 04 Sep 2011, 1:34 pm

There was a book before, yung Tibok. Lesbian anthology siya. Wala na bang ganun ngayon? I think you should submit something if there is.
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PostSubject: Re: Ramblings of a Cynical Heart   Sun 04 Sep 2011, 2:32 pm

Hmmm... wala na ata.. Ladlad na ang uso eh.. Naka 3 or 4 volumes na ata si Pareng Danton.. In time.. Mejo mas socially acceptable na kasi yung mga gays kesa sa mga lesbians eh.. Kaya mas madaling mag.publish ng books about them.. :)
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