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 confused lady

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geminibabe
Mahiyain
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PostSubject: confused lady   Tue 11 Nov 2014, 5:32 am

Hi ladies.. I'm so glad to found this forum wherein I can share my thoughts and feelings. I've been in a relationship with the same sex for 8 years with different types of girls and I still got confused about my sexual preference. When I was at grade school, I remember that I had a crush with a few guys at school. Then when I reached secondary school, that's the time where I had a boyish suitor. We became friends and latter become lovers. Then that's the start of it. Most break-ups at first is because of me not being showy because of me hiding our relationship. Then when I reached college, that's the time where I really fell too much in love with a guy that in the end broke my heart when found out that he already had a girlfriend but I also had a girlfriend that time. And now to make the long story short, I'm in a happy-mature relationship but still I'm having a feeling of interest in a guy workmate. It's just hard. I love my girlfriend so much, we're having an intimate relationship but then when I'm thinking about this guy or any guy whom I will like, I used to imagine things between us. I don't know what to do because I know at the first place why I don't like guys, it's because I'm afraid of having sex, losing my virginity, then being miserable and anything beyond that. But then I'm still going back of liking guys. I don't know what to do. My girlfriend and I have a great relationship and I don't want to waste it for some guy whom I know also had a girlfriend. The thing here is I don't know what the hell is happening to me, If I'm gonna end up with a girl or a guy in the future.
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lantis
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Fri 14 Nov 2014, 5:11 am

No one knows what the future holds, no one can say whether you'd end up with a guy or a girl. Focus on the now, on the present. When you say you're interested in your officemate - is this just the normal kilig feeling? Or do you find yourself wanting to spend more time with the guy, rather than your girlfriend?

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geminibabe
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Tue 18 Nov 2014, 8:31 am

hi lantis, thank you for responding to my topic. you're the only one though.. anyway, yea maybe it's just a simple crush and i knew whom i really love.. :)

i also have another issue to ask.. in the bedroom and beyond..
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lantis
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Thu 20 Nov 2014, 4:07 am

Haha. Baka busy mga tao, kaya ako lang nagreply. :))

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ok7 Too young to die.

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- Dean Alfar's The Middle Prince
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moem
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Thu 20 Nov 2014, 1:00 pm

focus on the present, sister. i am a BI but it's still whom you love most.

it may just be a fleeting crush that you have and that's normal to have one. the problem is when you act on it and betray the trust of your beloved.

keep the focus, lovely lady.

::flowers2::

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Advocate
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Thu 20 Nov 2014, 5:18 pm

You just have to treasure whatever you have with your present relationship..Think of what would happen if you mess up. I know you can't bear to lose your gf. Temptations are everywhere.. If you truly love your partner, then control yourself and spend more time with her.

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If the relationship fails, you won't end up blaming yourself..
Instead, you can have a tap in the back and say that you have given it your best shot..
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Poison
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Thu 20 Nov 2014, 10:51 pm

I see that you are confused as it even made me confuse about what exactly you're confused about.

My take on it:

1. Don't screw up your relationship by thinking about who you'll end with in the future. Cherish your relationship, one day at a time and work on it as long as you both want to be in it and you make each other happy.

2. Feelings for other people may come up. It happens. The point is, we have complete control of what we do. Choose not to be tempted. Sometimes, it's that feeling of novelty that gets to us. It makes us lose sight of the wonderful thing we already have. Don't make that mistake.

3. About being confused about sexuality, well, at the moment, you're with a woman and if you enjoy being intimate with her, why worry about fantasies about men? Your sexuality is only going to be an issue in your current relationship if you figure out that having sex with a woman, is not what you want.

I hope that helps. ;)

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geminibabe
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Mon 24 Nov 2014, 8:35 am

thanks moem and advocate.. and mostly to poison.. sorry if i made you confused.. everything you said is true.. i'm already working things out.. right now, we have another problem.. i'm gonna tell it soon..
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Toink
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Mon 24 Nov 2014, 1:58 pm

Geminibabe, you have a gf.  But at d same time, nag kaka crush ka sa lalake n meron narin gf.  Na confused tuloy ako parang tulad neto outcome n anak ni Jollibee at McDo. Lol.

Now listen.  Kung bored kna kay gf at di kna masaya……iwan mo.  Pero wag mong iiwan ng dahil lang sa nag kaka crush ka lang sa iba, you are somewhat sounds unfair!  And remember, crush lang yan!  At kung mag kaka crush ka ay wag na dun sa meron ng gf.  As if you are really making yourself a confused person.  Ano ba talaga ang gusto mo ate?!  And I noticed that your imagination goes far beyond your expectation……….may gf ng iba……tapos, pakikipag sex pa talaga agad ang nasa isip mo.  Hindi ba pwedeng i-boyfriend mo muna???  Then, afterwards, you make decision kung saan ka ba talaga masaya, o magiging masaya!

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Last edited by Toink on Tue 25 Nov 2014, 2:41 am; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : i called her confused lady instead of geminibabe.)
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Kardyn_21
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Mon 24 Nov 2014, 2:43 pm

Ung ganitong pag-iisip serial killer. :D Tapos, nag-iimagine ng things with a guy tpos may gf na? Hmmm, for me, having a crush on someone who is really gorgeous is normal however ung may iniimagine ka na like ewan ko kung anong iniimagine mo.Mega confused nga. U're one of those girls who will end up with men so why torment urself? Give up and get laid kc feel ko un naman tlga ung gusto mo, ur just so scared dun sa idea na bka u'll end up being miserable kc most of them are idiots, irresponsible, and aldulter pero not all of them anyway bka naman u'll end up with someone na mabait who'll give u lots of babies, then u'll populate the Earth even more that will cause shortage of food, economic crisis, world war 3. Hehehehe
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geminibabe
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Wed 26 Nov 2014, 9:26 am

Hi Toink and Kardyn_21..

Grabe naman..

Don't get me wrong guys..

I knew before that I'll turn out to be a bi..

I admit, most of you have said was true..

But I just want to clarify that since I haven't had an experience with a guy I haven't had any idea how is it to be with a guy..even so if I had..that will be a different story..probably I'm gonna be cautious in everything as if I'm like Maria Clara..

I had guy crushes before but I never told them because I don't want to..I know who I am and who I want to be with..I'm only speaking in general, I'm not a home wrecker..What I'm saying is even if I had a girlfriend I still have crushes on men that's it..and I don't have plans to be with them..I probably get curious about having sex but that's it..

Of course I think about those things..because I know for a fact that that will lead me to if I ever I had a relationship with a guy in the future. If that happens I will treasure it and that will happen in the right time..

I just want you to know guys that we are friends now and that I will treasure it, we're like brothers and sisters..no single feelings at all and I'm happy..


Thank you so much for your comments..


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Kardyn_21
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Wed 26 Nov 2014, 2:59 pm

You're really confused. How could you think of having a relationship with a guy in the future when u already have a gf. The way you wrote it , it's like napipilitan ka sa relasyon mo. I got crushes with men too, I can even say it out loud because that's how I appreciate beauty but I could not think of ending with someone else right now because I have a girlfriend , I am more focus on how I should keep the relationship and just think about what to do next if the relationship won't work anymore. I always think about the present, because when i'm with my gf, it feels right that I wanna stop the time. I only live once so before I enter my relationship I already knew that this is what I want. If you are in your rational mind, don't you think it should work like that? :D
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Wed 26 Nov 2014, 3:56 pm

There are moments of weakness. There are also moments of confusion. I think that we are very complicated beings and sometimes, not all our feelings and thoughts are easily understood or compartmentalized.

We have feelings, and it's up to us to decide what to do about them. What we can hope for is that we did everything we could to be as honest as possible to our feelings with the least destruction in our wake as possible.

Take your time to think about what you really want. If you think you are not yet able to fully commit to your partner because you have unresolved issues about your sexuality or even within yourself, then you might want to talk to your partner about that.

You know, you can join us in the chatbox sometimes confused lady, we could talk in real time and maybe we'd be able to help some more if you talk to us that way.

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DsCreet
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Mon 01 Dec 2014, 5:18 am

Very interesting thread @Geminibabe.

I think that this has nothing to do with LOVE since mahal mo pa nmn si gf, you're just curious with how intimacy is with a man. Feed your curiosity then, but you must be ready to face its consequences.

btw, @kardyn_21 ang hot ng DP mo. :P
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geminibabe
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Tue 02 Dec 2014, 5:32 am

Thanks to all of your comments guys..

Poison, yes I'm joining chatbox but most of the time some of you are not logged in. Maybe we could set meetups..
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Miso
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PostSubject: Re: confused lady   Fri 09 Jan 2015, 6:52 am

I think you should try both… and see what works for yah.

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